Spending Time in the Presence of God
A Testimony by Helen Wright
Being in the presence of
God is what every Christian wants, but somehow few learn how to do it
consistently. Occasionally we stumble into him, and we are delighted, but we
don't know how to get back. This frustrated me for years, and so I made a study
of it. This paper is the result of the books I have read, the churches I have
attended, the deep Christians I have fellowshipped with, and my own experiences
with God. I am indebted to all of the above. I pray that this helps you to draw
closer to God and spend more and more time in his presence. Consider this an
introduction; I am no expert. But these are the principles that have helped me
the most in my walk with God. If this topic intrigues you, as I hope and pray
it will, you will find a bibliography of sorts at the end of the article.
This article may be
copied, in its entirety, and freely distributed by any means in order to be
shared with members of the Body of Christ.
c. H. Wright, February
1996.
THE SUPERNATURAL REALM
When we delve into the
supernatural, we must be aware that there are two kingdoms there. We seek the
kingdom of light, but the kingdom of darkness is always eager to deceive and
delay us. We need to ask God to keep us safe on our journey, to guide us, to
keep us from all darkness. And we need to be wary lest we be deceived. Wear
your armor! See Ephesians chapter 6.
All revelation should
always be tested against the scriptures first. Anything that disagrees with the
Word of God must immediately be discarded. God will never contradict his
written canon and of course neither must we.
The more time we spend
in the scriptures the better we will be tuned to God's voice. The scriptures
are like a tuning fork; if we are on that same frequency, we will hear God's
voice clearly. Without immersing ourselves in God's word, we run the grave risk
of being misled by the darkness and going astray from God's truth, and worse,
leading others astray. If we receive a revelation and we do not know whether it
contradicts God's word or not, we must bring it to someone who can help us; a
pastor, or a mature believer with a solid understanding of the entire
scriptures.
If we are still unsure
whether a word is from God or not, it is better to "Put it on a
shelf", and wait for God to make it clear. Ask God-- "Is this from
you?" Be willing for the answer to take months or years. It is far better
to do nothing than to do damage!
HIS NEARNESS
"Closer is He than
breathing, Nearer than hands or feet." (from a small red book, read years
ago in an Episcopal home)
God is near. He fills
the room around you where you are sitting or standing. He is in the air above
you; he is in the ground below your feet. His presence is everywhere. He fills
the highest heavens, the deepest seas, down to the center of the planet and out
beyond the farthest-flung reaches of this galaxy, past myriads of other
galaxies, to the edge of the universe, and beyond that... Up, down, east, west,
out to infinity. And yet he stands beside you, now, hearing each breath you
take, noting every motion and every thought that comes from you.
He knows how many hairs
are on your head; and how many hairs are on your parents' heads, and your
uncles' and your aunts; he knows the hair count of every man, woman, and child
all over this green-and-blue globe, all five- billion of us, at this instant.
He could give us each individual count or the sum of them all. He knows
everybody's white-blood-cell count, how many nerves everyone has.
He knows everyone's thoughts,
all five billion of us. Every thought we ever had, every thought we are having
right now, and every thought we ever will have, are known to him, now, this
very instant. Every hurt we ever experienced, every bruise, every scrape, every
scar, every tear, he knows and remembers. All five billion of us. But most
importantly to you, he remembers every tear of yours. He knows every thought
you ever had or will have, and he knows all of your thoughts right now. And he
loves you.
He loves you despite
everything bad-- or good-- that you ever have done, everything that you ever
will do, and everything that you are doing right now. His love for you is with
full knowledge of who you are, and what you are.
He loves you infinitely,
for he is an infinite God. How many times can you divide infinity? Divide
infinity by two, and what do you have? Infinity. Divide infinity by father,
brother, friend, helper, commander, and you have infinity still. Divide that by
five billion, and you have the love of God for you: still, amazingly, infinite.
Infinity divided by five billion, you see, is still infinity. Your God loves
you infinitely as your father, infinitely as your brother, infinitely as your
friend, infinitely as your helper, infinitely as your commander; and more. For
he is also your Shepherd, your Counselor, your Savior, your Healer, your
Righteousness... infinitely. If you have given yourself to him, then this
infinite God is also infinitely yours.
And if you have given
yourself to him, then this infinite God also dwells In Your Heart. Closer than
close! He is closer to you than you are to yourself, for you are only aware of
a few things about yourself at any given moment, but God knows all about you at
every moment. He knows what you will think next, what your next move will be;
he knows when you will sneeze next, when you will speak next, when you will
sleep or stand.
He has searched you and
He knows you. He knows every struggle, every question, every desire, every
need, every want that you have, whether you are aware of them or not.
And the thing that he
wants most from you is very simple. What is the first and greatest commandment?
Love the Lord your God, with everything in you that you can muster. He wants
your love. Why else would he choose, as his dwelling place, your heart?
He wants you to love
him. Since he loves you, as we have seen, infinitely, and in multiple ways,
this sounds reasonable, doesn't it?
Why shouldn't we love
him back, gladly, with all of our hearts? What could possibly hold us back?
First, our sin; --but he
paid for our sins!! He died, as all believers should thoroughly understand,
that we might live, freed from the penalty of our sin. All he requires of us is
that we repent and trust in Jesus.
If it is so simple (and
it is simple enough for a child) what hinders us? Why do we not repent
immediately?
I think because we do
not see Him clearly, do not know him well enough, do not understand his awesome
love for us. I think the more we spend time in his presence, the more we
understand his love for us, and the more we know how long and wide and high and
deep is God's love for us, how strong, how like an ocean his forgiveness is, I
think we would run to him immediately, without a second thought. I think that
the more clearly that we see him with the eyes of our heart, we will fear to be
anywhere except at the center of his will for us. I think we will plead with
him to keep us in his will, to help us to please him, to help us to serve him.
Why? Because no one else loves us infinitely. No one else cares for us
infinitely. No one else knows us inside and out and still wants to bless us
with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places.
All the other reasons
for not loving God as we should-- like being encumbered by much serving, being
distracted from our first love by ministry-- will also pale and fade away when
we learn to see God and understand His love for us. So how do we learn to see
God like this? How do we learn to know him? How do we understand him? How do we
gain the revelation of how high, how wide, and how deep his love for us is? By
spending time in his presence. That is what this paper is about. I am very far
from having all the answers, but this is a beginning, and I ask the Lord to
bless this in your heart. The first step, since He does love us so much and
knows how to give us good gifts, is simply this--
Ask Him.
(You can do more than
pray after you have prayed, but you cannot do more than pray UNTIL you have
prayed.)
We need to tell God that
we want to know him. We want to love him. We want to learn more of him. But
what if we can't honestly say that? What if our hearts are stone-cold? Then we
can ask him to soften our hearts and give us the desire to love God more! He
loves us so much, he is perfectly willing to help us to love him in return. In
fact, without his help, we can't love him anyway, much less know that he is
there! So we still need to ask him. And we should never stop asking him. Asking
him for his help is the foundation of knowing him, and we always want to know
him more, so we should always ask him to let us know him more. I do not think
he will ever tire of hearing us say, "Help me to love you more. " As
strange as it sounds, we need to ask him for help in pursuing him till we find
him, and having found him, to pursue him again. For although he is infinitely
ours, our mind is far from infinite, and we cannot hope to hold infinity in our
fragile brains; so we must settle for a tiny little glimpse, and keep seeking
for one more tiny little glimpse, until we begin to assemble a panorama of His
glory in our hearts. And then having assembled what we know of Knowing God, we
will find it makes us even hungrier to know him more. I believe that this is
our highest calling while we are on earth: that we would each of us seek God,
and in finding Him, and knowing him, seek him again, and again, to learn more
of him, until we see him finally in heaven face to face. "Lord, please
help us to know our need for you, and to desire to know you, and to seek you,
and to find you, and see your glory. And having seen a taste of your glory, let
that give us such a hunger for more, that we will never cease to seek you. You
are enthroned above the Cherubim, and fill the universe, yet you dwell in our
hearts! Let us know your love, so that we will love you more. Open our hearts
to you, so that we may in turn, open them again to you, for they are yours by
right; let us make them yours in deed, in reality, completely."
WORSHIP
There are many different
forms of worship. In Pentecostal or charismatic circles, we tend to bundle all
our music together and call it worship, and let that be that. All our songs,
whether they be songs of praise, encouragement, warfare, victory, intercession,
thanksgiving, teaching; it all gets filed under "worship." Worship
can be without music, and music can be without worship. Many of our songs are
songs of encouragement, songs of teaching, or songs of warfare. They are not
bad songs; far from it. Songs that we sing to each other as believers, or songs
that we sing to drive back the darkness, are good and necessary songs, but we
need real worship songs as well. Worship songs bring us into the presence of
God. In a worship song, we tell the Lord that we love him, that we need him,
that we are grateful that he saved us and loves us. Worship is a time of
humbling ourselves before the Lord and enjoying his presence, getting as close
to Him as we can; letting him fill us with himself, and telling him over and
over again that we love him, that we are grateful to him for saving us, and
that we need him. It's not a time to talk to other Christians; it's a time to
draw near to God and seek His face. You may worship with no music at all. You
may worship the Lord, telling him how much you love him and are grateful to
him, in silence, in the stillness, where it is quiet and you are all alone. Or
you may find yourself worshipping the Lord in your heart in the middle of a
busy day. Worship, real, gentle, adoring, humble worship of our God, is why we
were created. That is why the first and greatest commandment is, "Love the
Lord thy God with all thy heart, all thy soul, all thy mind, and all thy
strength." Worship is loving God. If this seems strange to you, consider
that in heaven, the redeemed worship before God's throne night and day. "Thy
will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven." Certainly in heaven God's
perfect will is done, and we see the result; constant, fervent, heartfelt,
devoted, dedicated adoration of Jesus the Lamb that was slain, and God the
Father. Should we do less while we are on earth? "Worship the Lord in the
splendor of his holiness." You may ask, then what about the great
commission? If we are called to worship, why evangelize? Because everybody else
is called to worship too, and many of them aren't doing it because they are not
saved. Only by preaching the gospel can we bring others into their destiny,
which is to Love the Lord their God, with all their heart, soul, mind, and
strength. And if we want power to evangelize, how else will we find it but by
spending time with our God, worshipping him? Intercession is vital, and without
it the lost will stay lost; but we are changed, empowered, humbled and
strengthened by beholding God in worship.
WAITING ON GOD
Anytime that you find
something, a scripture or a song or a prayer or an exercise, that helps you to
bring your mind into the presence of God, use it. Return to it as long as there
is still revelation left in it. Sometimes we feel that we should move on to
other things, when in reality God wants us to park somewhere for a while and stay
there. Meditate on revelation as long as there is still life flowing from it.
When all the life is drawn from it, move on, and seek God anew. For instance,
if a verse of scripture speaks to you, and you sense God's presence, don't feel
that you have to rush on and read the rest of your chapter for the day. Stop
there. Feed on the revelation that flows from those words; let them draw you to
God. Once in His presence, stay there. Let God use the scripture to fill your
mind, fill your heart, fill your being. Let God use it to fill whatever it is
God wants to fill!! Remember the object of all this is for you to be with God.
It makes no sense for you to plow ahead and read six chapters, if God wants you
to focus on one simple verse and draw life from it, and from Him. Sometimes it
is a song that helps us into the presence of God. Don't get tired of that song
until you have drawn every last drop of anointing from it that you can. Then,
when you have received all the revelation that it has to offer and you have basked
in the presence of God until his presence just begins to fade, Then, and only
then, move on and ask him what's next. (In company, you can sing a song in the
silence of your heart; no need to drive your companions nuts.) Sometimes
childhood prayers have this effect. If suddenly you find that a line or two
from the Our Father, or from the twenty-third psalm, brings you into God's
presence, don't resist that anointing by twisting the scripture in which Jesus
warns against meaningless repetitions. The Our Father is NOT meaningless!!
Don't be deceived. So often the workings of God are so simple that we bypass
them and reject them while looking for something "Deep." Simple
things ARE deep!
When Jesus was warning
against meaningless repetitions, I believe he was talking about such things as
prayer wheels and other mechanical devices, or, rote memorization without
thought. These things have no spiritual profit. But to dwell on a simple truth,
letting it permeate our mind, our heart, our soul and our spirit until it
becomes part of us-- this is not what Jesus condemned. Be free to meditate on
simple things for hours or even days at a time. Meditation on God's word is
scriptural. And so is meditating on good, simple things: "Finally,
brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is
pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-- if anything is excellent or
praiseworthy-- think about such things." Phil 4:8.
REMEMBERING GOD
God is with us always.
Everywhere we go, He is there. But how easy it is for us to forget him! I read
a plaque once in a friend's house. I can't quote the words exactly but they
went something like this:
Christ is a member of
this household
The invisible Guest at
every meal
The silent Listener to
every conversation
How differently we act
and think, when we are aware of His presence near us. How can we be more aware
of his presence? There are many ways.
Have you ever had such a
good devotional time that you didn't want it to end? Ask the Lord to come with
you wherever you are going next. Make it a specific invitation. "Lord, I
have to get ready for work now. Would you please come with me?" Of course,
He will anyway, but I think it delights him to be asked. And it helps us to be
conscious that he is with us during the daily grind just as much as he is
during our devotional time.
There is another way
that I find simple but extremely effective. It may sound silly to you, but
there are times when I put a chair beside me for Jesus to sit in. When I am
driving the car, sometimes I clear the passenger seat for him. When I am
walking, I invite him to come along with me. I hold the door for him to go
through. He does not need me to do this, but it helps me to remember that he is
here. Some may condemn this as silly make- believe; and certainly, if I forgot
to hold the door, He would come with me anyway. He lives in my heart, so
wherever I go, He goes! But these little exercises are for softening my heart,
not his. And I do not think He is offended by it. In some cultures, I have read
that they set a place at the dinner table for the Lord on certain holidays. I
knew a pastor once, who, when he was first saved, would go for walks; and he
would hold up his hand over his head, like a little child reaching for his
Father's hand. He believed that God held his hand, and they walked together,
father and son. Silly make-believe? I don't think so; I think God was delighted
to walk with his new, young son.
Some people put plaques
on the walls; some people wear special jewelry or carry little reminders on
their person. The Jews used to put Scriptures on their door posts, and even in
little boxes worn on their foreheads. I find that no one method works all the
time. I may wear a cross around my neck, but in time, I become accustomed to it
and forget why I put it there. Then I need something else to remind me. I often
pray that God will put a song in my heart and remind me that way.
How else can we remember
that God is near us? It's not important how we do it, but it is very important
that we remember his presence. He is the most important person in our lives. If
we have to tie a string around our finger to remind us about him, let's do it.
Above all, let's ask him for help in remembering His presence with us.
God loves us. He is
truly with us; he surrounds us; and he dwells in our hearts. He never leaves us
alone. He cares for us as his children, for that we are. He knows our every
wish, need, and fear, and he will walk beside us through every joy and trial we
ever face. He stands beside you now. He surrounds you. More than that, he is in
your heart. Are you aware of him? Have you welcomed him? Do not condemn
yourself if you have not; simply take the time, put this paper down, and tell
him that you love him and you're glad he's here. No need to rush back! Spend
time with him. This paper will still be here later.
HIS PRESENCE
How do we enter in to
God's presence? There are many ways; you may find that the way you come to God
varies with the seasons of your life. Be open to change.
One way is just to start
talking to him. Another is to meditate on a scripture that puts you in mind of
God's presence. Another is to sing a song to the Lord. Another is to picture
him near you, beside you, and tell him that you love him. Another is to reach
quietly down inside your heart, where he dwells, and love him there. Sometimes
praying in the Spirit will bring us into his presence. Sometimes praying a
childhood prayer, like the Our Father. Or we may bring to mind a scene from
scripture, where Jesus ministered to the people, and place ourselves in that
scene. Or we may imagine a scene from revelation, and worship before God's
throne. Perhaps we are inspired by nature, his lovely creation.
The important thing is
not so much how you get into God's presence. The important thing is to get
there, and once you're there, stay as long as you can. Love him, and listen to
him. There is no greater destiny on earth than to be called into the presence
of God to worship him; yet this is the privilege all his children have.
PRACTISING
GOD'S PRESENCE
In the beginning, and
still even now, there were and are times when I am afraid to be in the presence
of God; and when I discover that I am in God's presence, I actually shy away
from him. This is perfectly human, and normal, but it does rob us of our
birthright in our King. Most of the old Testament prophets reacted with terror
when they realized that they were in God's presence. But he always purified
them, comforted them, and encouraged them. We need to ask God for courage to
come to him, to be cleansed, and to remain in his presence, gazing at him with
the eyes of our heart. There is nothing better for us, anywhere in the
universe. Our highest calling is to behold God! For the more we behold him the
more we love him, and worship him, which is what we are created to do. In
beholding, loving, and worshipping God, we are fulfilling our destiny! So we
must ask him to help us look at him. We must ask him to give us courage to
come, and be cleansed, and to gaze at him forever. Everything else that we do
is secondary to this. Everything else that we do should flow from our beholding
God. If we love, it is because He loves and we follow. If we give, it is
because He gives and we follow. If we go, it is because He sends us. Let us
listen well to our master and learn to go exactly where he wants us to go and
do exactly what he wants us to do. Entering into God's presence can be
difficult at first if we are afraid. Some of us have been taught to fear God's
presence. We should be awe-struck; but we should not let fear keep us from our
Father. Come boldly before him, to find mercy-- even mercy to be unafraid to
come to him!
"Lord, sometimes
when I draw near to you I am afraid. Help me to stay near you. Help me to hold
my heart in your presence. Help me to stay close to you, and let your very
nearness purify me and strengthen me. I need you; help me come to you and be
filled, and gaze at you steadily."
BEHOLDING GOD
How do you get to know
someone? Let's say you have met someone you want to befriend. You will listen
to them, and learn what they like and dislike, and you will watch their
expressions; when you're listening to them, you will probably look into their
eyes. You will watch the expressions on their face, the way they stand, the way
they move about. This will tell you what kind of person they are.
You may find that you
absorb some of their characteristics. We want to apply the same principles to
God. How do we do that? How do we see him? How do we listen to him? It is
written that "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow
me." It is also written, "blessed are the pure in heart, for they
shall see God." And, " When you said unto me, 'Seek ye my face', my
heart said unto thee, Thy face, Lord, will I seek." Ps 27
"And I-- in
righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with
seeing your likeness." Ps 17
"Look to the Lord
and his strength; Seek his face always." Ps 105
And in 2 Cor 4 we read:
"For God, who said, "let light shine out of darkness", made his
light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of
God in the face of Christ."
2 Cor 4:6 "So we
fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is
temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
So therefore we are to
see what is unseen-- the face of God. How do we do this? How do we do anything
that is spiritual? By asking God!! Once again we return to the fact that we can
do nothing without him, nothing that will last or have any spiritual value. We
ask him.
"Lord, I do not
know how to see you, yet your word says, Seek His face. How do I do this? Show
me your face. I want to see you; I want to see what is unseen and eternal. But
I do not know how. In your mercy, teach me. Show me. Open the eyes of my heart
so that I can see your face." Persist in this. Persist knowing that He who
gives good gifts will surely show you! He wants you to see him. He wants you to
know him. The only stumbling blocks are these: our pride, our reason, and our
inexperience.
Once again, we return to
our Helper. He wants to purify you; and it is written, blessed are the pure in
heart for they shall see God. Let God purify the pride out of you. Isn't is
worth losing your pride in order that you learn to see God? And we also want to
lose our unbelief, disguised as reason. For our mind will tell us that there is
no way to see what is unseen. And indeed, without God, that is true, but with
God all things are possible; and, we can do nothing without him. "Lord, I
do not want my pride to keep me from seeing you. Please take it out of the way.
And I do not want my scholastic mind to convince myself that you were only
kidding when you wrote those scriptures. The darkness does not want me to see
you. I choose to believe; help thou mine unbelief. And since I have no
experience in seeing you, please help me gain experience in seeing you, and
learn as I go. Teach me, Lord, I want to learn."
Once again, persist.
(And when you do see God, even a little glimpse of Him, with the eyes of your
heart, do not be proud of it; thank God for having mercy on you and showing
himself to you. )
What will you see?
You may see a vision.
Visions are scriptural. There are different kinds. You may see pictures in your
minds eye, as if it were your imagination. Do not discount this. God can use
the screen of your imagination, and paint pictures there for you to see. When
pictures come unbidden to your mind's eye, they may be from God. Test them
against scripture. If they contradict scripture dismiss them at once. If they
line up with scripture, watch what is unfolding in your minds' eye. If you
don't understand, ask God to show you more. If there are people in the picture
in your mind, you can ask them what is going on; the apostle John did this in
Revelation. (Be careful not to worship anyone except God. )
You may see a vision
with your eyes open, although this is very rare. There is another kind of
"Seeing with your heart." It is a kind of knowing. It is receiving
truth, directly into your heart. While this may seem less exciting than seeing
a vision, it can change you more deeply in the long run. It can mean more to
your whole being. It may not involve a picture, and you may not really be aware
of it while it is happening, but it will change you nonetheless.
JOURNALING
I attended a seminar
about a decade ago on being in the presence of God, which heavily emphasized
keeping a notebook while we dialog with God. I find this extremely effective.
While we are learning to distinguish between our thoughts and God's thoughts in
our hearts, it is extremely helpful to write down the flow of thoughts and look
at it. You may be surprised to see how much God has to say to you. Sit down
with your notebook in a comfortable place such as a desk or table, make sure
your heart is right before God and that you are wearing your armor, clear your
mind, seek God's heart, and begin to write. A question- and- answer format is
very effective. "Lord, what is your will about Such-and such?" and
then write down the thoughts that follow in your heart. In reading the dialog
later, you can easily compare the responses to God's word and throw out
anything that conflicts with the scriptures. The rest, you can judge yourself
or submit to someone you trust. In time you will grow more and more accustomed to
discerning God's voice. Like any other method of entering the supernatural
realm, you need to ask for God's protection and his anointing, and thoroughly
test what you receive, and be sure that it is from the Lord.
HUMILITY
It is a good idea to
write down what you see, so as to test it all against scripture. But remember
to humble yourself before God, and do not get puffed up about what you see! We
are all human, we can all be wrong, and if we get mixed up with pride, we are
guaranteed a fall. Remember that a wise man loves a rebuke, while a fool scoffs
at instruction.
A humble person sees
himself accurately in God's sight. A humble person knows that they can do
nothing apart from God, and that everything that they can do, God has done in
them and through them. The more that you see God himself, the more humble you
will become, because you will see yourself in proportion to him, and He is
infinite, and you are not.. Humility is not belittling yourself. You are a
child of the King, and that makes you a prince or a princess. But humility does
mean understanding that you did not earn that position; God gave it to you, as
he gave you every other spiritual blessing in the heavenly places. He is
everything; He is our source of light and life; it is not about us, it is about
Him.
So humble yourself
beneath the mighty hand of God. And if you do not know how to do this? Ask him,
and He will teach you. "Lord, I want to see what you have to show me. And
I want to learn and grow spiritually. But I do not want to become puffed up by
what I see, and so fall into pride, and go the devil's way. Please teach me to
humble myself beneath your mighty hand, faithfully, regularly. Show me the
difference between true humility and false humility. And please do not let me
grow proud; rebuke and chasten me first."
WATCH AT THE RAMPART
Once you have learned to
see in the Spirit, you may find God is calling you to watch in the spirit.
There are many things that you may see. This is now a means of communication
between you and your Lord. In natural, earthly warfare, commanders post guards
to watch the horizon while those in the city or in the citadel sleep, or carry
on their business. These warriors watch for signs of enemy activity; they will
also see approaching storms, or the arrival of allies and friends. Whatever
these watchmen see, they report to their commander. If you are called to be a
watchman, develop that relationship between you and your pastor. Report what
you see to him. It is our duty to report what we see, but we are not the
commanders, and we must remember that. Read the passage in Ezekiel 33 in which
God calls him to be a watchman, and read Habakkuk.
PRAYING WITHOUT CEASING
A common method of
coming into God's presence is simply to begin a conversation with him. This conversation
can begin anywhere, anytime. And God wants us to speak with him. Many of us
wish that God would speak back to us. We remember that verse, "My sheep
hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me," and we long to hear
the voice of Jesus speaking to us, and we listen, but do not know how to hear.
The voice of God speaks most often in our hearts. It is unusual to hear an
audible voice, although it does happen. But mostly God speaks to us in the
quiet of our hearts. This brings up two points.
First, God is using our
own thought patterns to speak to us. We often assume that the thoughts in our
mind are ours alone. But God is speaking into our heart. If we are tuned in to
him, if we have spent time reading the scriptures and worshipping, and if we
desire to hear him speak to us, he will speak into the peace of our heart. We
can learn to distinguish his thoughts from our thoughts, and we can hold
conversation with him.
Second, if God speaks in
the peace of our hearts, we will have a hard time hearing him if our heart is
noisy all the time! So we must learn to quiet our hearts. "Be still and
know that I am God." "I have quieted my soul like a weaned
child."
Quieting our hearts
involves several layers. Quieting our hearts involves rejecting any violent
emotions like anger, jealousy, and any other works of the flesh as listed in
the scripture. (Galatians 5:19). If you are not cleansed of these, you will not
be able to trust the impressions in your heart. If you struggle with violent
emotions, I am sure that you have asked the Lord for help with them. But now
here is a new reason; that you can hear his voice more clearly. (If you do
struggle with violent emotions, I believe your best avenue is to lock your eyes
on God. The more you behold him, the more you will want to be like him; the
more you will love him; and as you love God, his Spirit will flow through you,
changing you. If you try and change yourself, odds are the change won't last.
But if you remain in God's presence, and ask Him to change you, you will be
changed from the inside out, and the changes will last. Spend as much time as
you can in God's presence, loving and worshipping him, and ask him to heal you
of the things that you struggle with. You may also want to ask the Lord for
people to pray for you, for healing from these emotions.) Quieting our hearts
also involves stilling our own wants. We all have wants, needs, wishes,
desires. They are not all bad or unreasonable. I do not believe that ignoring
or quenching these wants is the answer. This is not the time to "Deny
self". Instead, ask the Lord for what you want, no matter how big, how
small, how reasonable or how unreasonable. If it is welling up in your heart
that you want this thing, ask your Father for it! If it is a good request, you
can rest assured that he will answer it. If it is not, then as you are asking
for it, you will either gently understand that he loves you too much to give
you such a thing; or, you will at least be able to place the desire in his
hands so that he can deal with it. In this way, we can still the clamor in our
hearts-- by knowing that our Provider will give us everything we truly need,
and as for our wants and wishes, he has been asked, and the wish list is now up
to him.
The third part of
quieting our hearts is just that our hearts are human and have a tendency to
wander. This is an area in which we will grow with time and grace. If your mind
wanders, just gently call out to the Lord again and return to him lovingly and
gently. Don't beat yourself up; just come back home to God. Hold your heart in
God's presence as best you can. Since being in God's presence involves your
heart more than anything, you will learn in time to hold your heart in God's
presence while your mind deals with the daily grind. This, I believe, is one
method of praying without ceasing. Deep in your heart, you have God, and you
love him, gently and quietly, as the day flurries by. Often we try to have
peace, we try to love, we try to be gentle, but the world spins us up. But if
we hold our hearts in God's presence, if our hearts are full not of peace only,
but of the God of peace and of love and of gentleness, the result will be
different.
"Lord, help me to
get in the habit of keeping my heart quiet, so that I can hear you more often
than not. Help me to hold my heart in your presence, to love you as the day
goes by. I want you to be with me, all the time. I love you."
PURIFYING OUR HEARTS
If we have sin in our
hearts we need to confess it right away. Sin will keep us from enjoying the
Lord. If we sin in His presence we will want to leave his presence; and if we
are away from him and we sin, we won't want to return to him because coming to
the light reveals our sin, of which we are ashamed. But we must overcome this
fear, and accept the sacrifice Jesus made for us. "If we confess our sin,
he is faithful and just to forgive us our sin and cleanse us from all
unrighteousness." Don't let sin stay in your heart. Get it washed away as
quickly as possible; why would you want to be away from your Lord, your life
and your love and your hope and your destiny, any longer than you had to? Hurry
back to Jesus. Come boldly before His throne of grace, to find mercy and help
in time of need. When is our greatest time of need? When we are steeped in sin.
So it is when we are drenched in sin, covered with evil, that we most need to
run to the Lord. This goes against all our instincts because we know that he
hates sin. But, bless the Lord, he loves us, even when we are covered in sin,
and he wants to wash it if of us so that we can enjoy him and draw close to him
again.
"Lord, help me to
run to you in time of sickness and in health; when I am clean and when I am
unclean; when I have done well, and when I have done badly. For you are the
answer to all my needs. You heal my wounds, you wash away my sins, you make me
stronger in you. No matter what I have done or not done, I need to run to you.
Here I am, Lord, and here are all my needs."
WE MUST DECREASE
The more we want God to
use us, to work through us, the more we desire to be completely submitted to
his will, the more we want to decrease that He might increase. This is a whole
topic for another paper... Suffice it to say for now, that if we are serious
about God, he will crucify our sin nature, and it will be well with us if we
cooperate with him and let him. I am not saying we should try to crucify
ourselves; leave that work to God. But when we feel unbearable suffering and
pain, and we think that we cannot bear it one second more, that is probably the
cross we are to bear; try to accept it as best you can. One man's unbearable
cross may seem trivial to another, so we ought not to judge each other. What is
unbearable to your eighbor, you could bear; but what you cannot bear, he could.
God tailors the cross to each heart, to humble us and decrease us, so that he
might increase.
How do we tell the
difference between the attacks of the devil and the cross sent by God? That's a
difficult question, but if the "attack" is hurting our pride, our
self-importance, our "dignity", or striking at an idol in our hearts,
we can guess the answer. The devil comes to hurt, to steal and to destroy;
Jesus comes that we might have life, and that more abundantly. Will submitting
to the pain bring glory to God? This is a part of learning to discern, too. A
difficult person, a difficult situation may not be the enemy at all, but our
very best friend in disguise. We need to pray for wisdom, and see. If we try to
dodge the cross, it will come back around, and we will have to face it again;
because he who began a good work in us will complete it until the day of Christ
Jesus.
Sometimes the cross is
unrecognizable and all seems hopeless. When all seems dark, hold onto God, and
choose to believe in Him whether you can feel his presence or not. Stand in
faith. He will never leave you or forsake you, even if the trial makes it seem
as though he has.
"Lord, help me to
discern the difference between the enemy's attacks and your cross. Help me, as
much as I can, not to dodge your hand; but let me resist the devil as I should.
Deliver me from the evil one; and give me wisdom, and patience, to submit to
your workings in my heart and soul."
WE ARE EACH A TEMPLE OF
THE HOLY SPIRIT
We have already
mentioned that Jesus dwells in the heart of the believer. Hence, he is always,
especially Now, available to us. God has chosen to make his home in us. He
tells us in his word that we are the temple of the Holy Spirit. Is He at home
there? Ask yourself, Is God comfortable dwelling inside my heart? Have I given
him truly free access to every corner, every room, every window and door? Or
have I relegated him to a corner or two?
Does He like the
decorations? Does he like the daydreams that float past him? Does he like the
conversations that he hears? Does he enjoy the music? Does he enjoy my other
guests? Are there deep dark places that I'd just as soon he stay out of? How
can we make the most important guest in the universe feel at home and welcome
in our heart?
I believe the most
important thing I can do is to go to him right away and tell him I WANT him to
feel welcome, and ask him to cleanse and decorate the temple-- my heart-- as he
sees fit. I want him to be in charge because He knows my needs, and he knows my
destiny, and he loves me completely; and only He can guide me to fulfill my
destiny. So why not turn over to him my appointment calendar, my video and
music collection, my library, my collection of "treasures and
memories", and ask him to place it all in order-- while I, like Mary and
not like Martha, sit at his feet and be with him.
Jesus came to our heart
the same reason he came to Mary, Martha, and Lazarus's home: to be with them
because he loved them. He wants to be with us, too, because He loves us. No
serious Christian seeks to displease the Lord. But like Martha, we aim to
please-- at the wrong target. He wants our hearts, and we give him works. These
works may range from bible studies to charity work to missions to evangelism,
whatever. None of these things are bad if they spring from sitting at his feet,
but if we neglect to sit at the feet of Jesus, we will be like Martha-- well
meaning, and gently chastened by our Lord.
"Lord, I want you
to feel at home in my heart. Purify my heart; arrange it the way you want it to
be. And I will sit here, at your feet, and listen to you, and look up into your
eyes. I have wanted to be with you deep inside, but instead I have run after
other things. Please forgive me. Please help me to stay here, at your feet, and
keep me from wandering off; and when I do wander, please draw me back, to sit
at your feet again."
Here, Oh Lord, have I
prepared for you a home;
Long have I desired for
you to dwell
Here, Oh Lord, have I
prepared a resting place
Here, Oh Lord, I wait
for you alone.
-- Vineyard worship song
Books that have helped me
tremendously, besides the Bible:
The Pursuit of God, by
A.W. Tozer
--An excellent book,
very challenging, very deep.
Experiencing The Depths
Of Jesus Christ, by Madame Guyon.
--Another phenomenal
book that I can't recommend highly enough. Mme. Guyon was imprisoned numerous
times by Louis the 14th for sharing her deep, simple, life-changing method of
prayer. Try to find the modern translation, published by Christian Books, ISBN
0-940232-00-6 .
Practising the Presence
of God; the dialogs and letters of Brother Lawrence.
--You can find this one
on the Internet, at Wheaton's Library of Christian Classics, or you can buy it;
again, look for a good modern translation. The one on the internet uses
somewhat archaic language.
(I wish that the above
three books could be on every Christian's shelf... I think the world would be a
different place. Please seriously consider getting them.)
Other books of interest:
The Release of the
Spirit by Watchman Nee
Deeper Experiences of
Famous Christians by James Gilchrist Lawson, ISBN 0-87162-069-3, Warner Press
My Heart, Christ's Home
(a tract, check your local bookstore)
The Soul Afire:
Revelations of the Mystics, edited by H. A. Reinhold, c. 1944 by Pantheon
Books.
--This book came from my
grandmother, and I suspect it's out of print. Try the Library, which is a great
source for the early Mystics in general.
Another place to look
for the Mystics is the excellent collection at Wheaton's Library of Christian
Classics, on the internet.
You can also learn a lot
from the Vineyard sites on the internet; there is a wealth of good material
about worship and hearing God in the Vineyard as a whole, and some of it is
available online. One link that will get you there is:
http://groke.beckman.uiuc.edu/AVC/
Titles of books I found
at a university Library, years ago, for which I unfortunately did not get the
Author's name:
The Meditative Poem
The Notable Prayers Of
Christian History
The Golden Sequence
The English Mystical
Tradition
...Check the card
catalog under Mystic, and Prayer.
One last note before I
close.
While these books are a
great help, it is easy to spend all our time reading books, and forget or
neglect the One we are reading about. Reading is no substitute for spending
time with Him. Seek His face; sit at His feet; wait in His presence.
In closing-
Lord, please bless this
work, and let there be a hunger and a fire in the heart of each one who reads
it, lit by You. Draw us to yourself, Lord. Teach us to know you, to seek you,
to worship you; to hold you as most precious in our hearts. Let us prepare a
sanctuary for you in our hearts so that you will be at home there, always. And
lead us always closer to you, always nearer to you.
Day by day
Oh Dear Lord Three
things I pray
To see thee more clearly
Love Thee more dearly
Follow Thee more nearly,
day by day
